Soldevilla admits his addiction: "I'll have it all my life"

Toni Soldevilla, former iconic captain of RCD Espanyol between 1997 and 2005, has broken his silence in an interview with El Periódico. With rare candor, he revealed: "I had an addiction problem, and I will have it all my life". A confession that sheds light on the behind-the-scenes of a career marked by painful choices. The Catalan club, unable to hide its player’s struggles any longer, finally had to confront an unsustainable situation. Soldevilla then checked himself into a center in Valencia to begin treatment.

A career fraught with obstacles

Soldevilla, now 47 years old, explained the reasons behind his sudden withdrawal before a match against Deportivo La Coruña. The club could no longer conceal the reality. "All the problems related to my drug addiction came to light", he told Francisco Cabezas. The former center-back, who wore the club’s colors for eight seasons, fully acknowledges his mistakes: "I don’t feel proud of my behavior, either professionally or as a representative of the club". Yet he recognizes that this period was a turning point: "The fact that I stopped, had to expose myself, and let people know what I was going through ultimately helped me". The 2000s, marked by persistent taboos around mental health, did not make things easier. Soldevilla admits he had to overcome prejudices: "Saying you were going to a psychologist was highly frowned upon back then". This realization led him to accept his need for help: "It’s something completely natural, something everyone should be able to do". A crucial step in understanding the extent of his struggles.

The diagnosis that changed everything

Soldevilla was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and depression. This revelation turned his self-perception upside down. "I had no idea what ADHD was", he confesses. After a six-month stay at Vall d'Hebron under the supervision of psychiatrist Miquel Casas, he began medication. The specialist confirmed he had a clear profile of adult ADHD. "I felt a radical change in my head, emotionally and in my thoughts", he explains. This transformation allowed him to understand and, above all, accept himself: "I had an illness, a treatable mental disorder". The former player, now 47, born on December 19, 1978, describes this period with emotion: "I felt like a failure, frustrated, guilty...". Unanswered questions haunted him: "Why? Why? Why?". Until he realized the obvious: "I was sick. I had an addiction problem, and I will have it for life". This acceptance marked the beginning of a fresh start.

A commitment to others

Since retiring, Soldevilla has found a new lease on life in mentoring young people. He has dedicated himself to fitness training and occasionally teaches at a school. Since 2019, he has also represented the Canary Islands delegation within the footballers' union (AFE). This career change is particularly close to his heart: "Teaching and studying fulfill me," he confides. A way for him to pass on his experience and show that, even after a sports career, it is possible to rebuild oneself. Soldevilla reminds us of a simple but essential truth: "Footballers are people like everyone else." Their status does not protect them from the same hardships as ordinary people. "Being a footballer does not exempt you from having the same problems as a baker, a worker, or your neighbor," he emphasizes. A lesson in humility that resonates far beyond the football fields.